The Tuesday List: Great Movie Bodyguards

The Hitman’s Bodyguard opens this Friday and you just know that Ryan Reynolds is going to bring it as the titular bodyguard. However, before we get to sink our teeth into that meaty offering, I figured I’d give you some other bodyguards to love in the meantime.

Great Movie Bodyguards

 "Screw you ER era George Clooney! It was my haircut first!" (pinterest.com)

"Screw you ER era George Clooney! It was my haircut first!" (pinterest.com)

Frank Farmer (The Bodyguard)- Well, for one thing, it is the name of the darn movie. So, you know, attention must be paid.

For another, Farmer (Kevin Costner) was damn good at his job. So good in fact that even though he failed to follow the rules—his own rules I might add—by distinct failing to “never fall in love,” he still managed to protect his charge, world’s biggest pop star Rachel Marron (Whitney Houston) and take down the bad guy.

Plus that soundtrack? Flames.

Duane Stevenson (Dave)- Stevenson (Ving Rhames) is deadly serious and by the book despite the lunacy—namely replacing President Bill Mitchell (Kevin Kline) with a lookalike—swirling around him. Even though he knows the President isn’t the President but just a regular guy named Dave (again, Kevin Kline), he still faithfully carries out the duties of a Secret Service agent without question.

 When you wanna let your boys know you saw them so you kind of smile but you are also in the middle of intimidating a witness. (everythingaction,com)

When you wanna let your boys know you saw them so you kind of smile but you are also in the middle of intimidating a witness. (everythingaction,com)

Frank Horrigan (In the Line of Fire)- Yes, our man Horrigan (Clint Eastwood) failed to save President Kennedy. But he was the first agent to catch up to the moving car and the first one to be there for Jackie.

Moreover, in the present of the film, he matches wits with a very scary, very diabolical Mitch Leary (John Malkovich) and stop his elaborately evil plot. All of it being set one of the finest scores of the decade, courtesy of Ennio Morricone, just enhances things that much more.

T-800 (Terminator 2)- Does it count? Yes it does. Why wouldn’t it? Because he’s a T-800? Well, seems like you might have some hangups about metal people, huh?

He is ruthlessly efficient, incredibly resilient, and always brings roses to a shootout. He not only survives but defeats a more advanced model of android than himself. Plus, he makes an effort to learn his charge’s lingo! Solid bodyguarding there.

 "Gajje! I wish you had...more time! To discuss how great I am!" (die-hard-scenario.wikia.com)

"Gajje! I wish you had...more time! To discuss how great I am!" (die-hard-scenario.wikia.com)

John Creasy (Man on Fire)- Creasy (Denzel Washington) isn’t, shall we say, the best role model. He drinks a lot, contemplates suicide on the regular, and is not a vast source of warmth. However, as rendered by Washington, there is no denying he is good at this job—protecting Lupita Ramos (Dakota Fanning) from kidnapping—nor that he still doesn’t have some humanity under his skin.

His rampage through those that might know what happened to his charge is plenty memorable but where Creasy really excelled was helping Lupita get over her fears and become a better swimmer as a result.

If it wasn’t for a man on the inside undermining Creasy, I don’t think those kidnappers ever get close enough to even touch the young girl’s hair, nevermind snag her.

Doug Chesnic (Guarding Tess)- Here’s all you need to know. Nic Cage stars as a Secret Service agent Chesnic. End of story. Of course he’s one of the best bodyguards ever. He’s Nic Cage.

 ...the only thing about me is the way I walk. (ocregister.com)

...the only thing about me is the way I walk. (ocregister.com)

Thomas Barnes (Vantage Point)- You know you are a great bodyguard when the you stop the President from being killed, thus becoming a hero, and still feel guilty because the situation got that close to bad in the first place. Such is the case with Barnes (Dennis Quaid). Sadly, this does not make our hero any good at spotting traitors in his team, but he is not a spy, he’s a Secret Service agent.

BONUS: Betty (“Call Me Al”)- I assume Chevy Chase is playing Betty and thus is the bodyguard in question? Plays a mean horn, tell you that much.