“Now Understand This” by Boomkat from BoomkatalogeOne

Dancing Cult Takes Last Waltz

Springdale, AR—After months of capturing the nation’s attention and bringing low Arkansas’s Washington County, the “movement—labeled a cult by many—known as “Kat Style” was rounded up by police officials, en masse, and brought into country lockup.

Details remain difficult to uncover at this with both state and local police representatives refusing to speak at this time. Additionally, the only known free member of Kat Style—one Charlene Bristol who now insists that she is only known by the name Portfolio—has refused to come out of hiding and will only respond to inquiries for comment with simple emailed responses either encouraging the questioners to join Kat Style or accusing interviewers of being aligned with a government conspiracy.

For those familiar with Kat Style and its rhetoric, these responses must come as no surprise. Originally rising to prominence as the “dancing cult,” the group, founded by twin sisters Gloria and Geraldine Pulaski, were first spotted in New Britain, Connecticut. Finding the Land of Steady Habits generally unreceptive to the twins’ bizarre mashup message of imminent doom and joyful dance, the Pulaskis left the region and traveled across the country.

Stepping up their rhetoric and lacing it with anti-government sentiment gained them a sizable following and, more importantly, a strong online presence. With local businessman Clyde Berringer a quick covert, the twins quickly found themselves the new owner of Berringer’s massive estate which he awarded them for their religious activities. Berringer disappeared less than a month later and has yet to be found.

While Kat Power gained detractors in Arkansas almost immediately, its base of power expanded even faster. At last count, the group lay claim to some 3300 local members and nearly 30 times that online. All this without a clear set of principles or practices; all that was known of the group’s philosophy was that they believed the United States as we know it would soon end, in part due to domestic conspiracy, and that the only way to ensure protection for yourself and those you love during the “inevitable” blood shed was through the power of dance.

It was during one of these marathon dance sessions last month that the group allegedly forcibly converted Springdale’s town council and at least 5 police officers. This has also been cited as the moment Kat Style ceased to be viewed as mere comic relief. It is also the time the twins disappeared. Allegations have flown—some insisting that the government had taken them to a secret prison, others believing that the twins were simply long con artists who knew that the time had come to split, while still others are convinced the twins ascended, despite Kat Style having no stated opinion on the afterlife or heaven.

While the group is unquestionably unusual and often out of step with Springdale values, as with their recent Orgasmic Orgy, staged on the Town Hall steps, there is little to explain the unprecedented steps taken today to arrest nearly every member within the state borders and seize control of the Kat Style website.